sentence-transformers/parallel-sentences-talks

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Behavioral economists call this hyperbolic discounting.	行為經濟學家稱這個現象為「雙曲貼現」。
And Levitt goes as far as to say that all motivating power vanishes when rewards are handed out with a delay.	萊維特竟然還說，當獎賞的分發時間被延遲時，所有的驅動力量都會消失。
So, from a purely economic point of view: if we don't use immediate incentives, we are underinvesting in student outcomes.	所以，純粹從經濟的觀點來看：如果我們不使用立即的獎勵，我們對於學生成果的投資就是不足的。
I took heart from that, and came to see that as a society, we're actually quite used to financial incentives.	那增加了我的信心，我漸漸了解，我們這個社會其實很習慣財務的獎勵。
Whether it be by the government, by employers or at home.	不論是由政府提供、僱主提供，或家裡提供的獎勵。
For instance, many parents would pay their children an allowance or pocket money for doing chores in the house.	比如，許多父母會付錢給孩子，給他們零用錢或私房錢要他們做家事。
So it wasn't really all that controversial.	所以，這種做法並沒有那麼爭議。
As I thought about that, it started to answer that second question of how we were going to fund this.	當我想到這點時，它也開始解答了第二個問題，我們的資金從哪裡來。
Naturally, parents are the most invested in their children's education.	自然地，在孩子的教育中投資最多的人就是父母。
So, let's charge them a weekly subscription fee to use our program, but -- if the students complete their weekly maths goal, we'll refund the subscription amount directly into the child's bank account.	所以，咱們來向他們收取每週的訂購費，付費使用我們的程式，但是，如果學生完成了他們的每週數學目標，我們就把訂購費的金額直接退還到孩子的銀行帳戶中。
We chose three exercises completed over a one week period for a 10 dollar reward.	我們選了三項練習要在一週內完成，獎賞為 $10。
That way we're incentivizing effort rather than performance over a short enough period and with a substantial enough payout for the students to care.	這麼一來，我們在獎勵的就是努力而非表現，經過很短的時間就能得到獎勵，獎勵的金額也足夠讓學生在乎。
Now, I remember when I first told my wife about this new business model.	我記得我初次告訴我太太這個新的商業模型時的狀況。
If she had any doubt left that I've gone completely mad, that pretty much confirmed it for her.	如果她有一點點懷疑我完全瘋了，那幾乎讓她確認了。
She said to me, "Mo ...	她對我說：「小穆……
you realize that if everybody does their homework, which you want, you're not going to make any revenue, which you don't want.	你要知道，如果人人都如你所願好好地做他們的家庭作業，你就不會有任何利潤，這非你所願。
Great business model."	好棒的商業模型。」
(Laughter) I say it's more like an antibusiness model, it's free if you use it, but you pay if you don't.	（笑聲）我說，它比較像是個反商業模型，用它就是免費的，不用它就要付費。
Now, I knew from experience that not everybody in the country was going to jump on and do their maths homework every week.	根據經驗，我知道，不可能全國每個人都會因此動起來，並每週完成數學的家庭作業。
And if they did, sure we'd go bust pretty quickly, but hey, we would have solved the country's maths skills crisis.	若大家都做到，我們很快就會破產，但，嘿，我們就能解決這個國家的數學技能危機呢。
(Laughter) As a company, we've always run a double bottom line, looking to both make a return for investors as well as improve student outcomes.	（笑聲）我們開公司總是會有雙重底線，期望能為投資者取得收益，同時也要改善學生的結果。
We know that our path to long-term profitability is through improving student outcomes.	我們知道若想要有長期收益性，就要去改善學生的結果。
So our dual objectives should never be at odds.	所以，我們的雙重方針應該永遠不會不一致。
So we're always looking to make our product decisions around helping students reach their weekly maths goal, effectively ensuring that they get paid and not us.	所以，我們總是在注意，當要做產品決策時，要考量能協助學生達成他們的每週數學目標，有效地確保他們會賺到錢，而不是我們。
Now you must be wondering: How is this crazy business model going?	你們現在一定在納悶：這瘋狂的商業模型進展如何？
You'll be glad to know we're still in business.	你們會很高興知道，我們還在營運。
We've been testing this now for the last five months on just our personal home users in Australia before we think about rolling it out to schools.	過去五個月，我們一直在測試，對象只有我們在澳洲的居家個人使用者，之後才會考慮把它推展到學校。
And here are the early results.	這些是早期的結果。
The green represents students who are completing their weekly maths goal and the red those who aren't.	綠色代表的是完成每週數學目標的學生，紅色則是沒有完成。
You can see a lot more completing their homework than not.	你們能看到，完成的人比沒完成的人多很多。
In fact, as our user base has grown, we found the percentage to be pretty steady, at around 75 percent.	事實上，隨著我們的使用者基礎變大，我們發現，百分比相當穩定，大約在 75%。
So on average, we receive our weekly subscription fee once every four weeks, and the other three weeks, we're rewarding the students.	所以，平均來說，我們每四週會收到一次的每週訂購費，剩下的三週則是在獎勵學生。
Now of course we're leaving some money on the table here, but guess what?	當然，我們有把一些錢留在桌上，但，你們猜如何？
It turns out these students are 70 percent more engaged than students not on the reward program.	結果發現，這些學生比沒有參與獎勵方案的學生，投入程度還要高 70%。
Check.	打勾（確認）。
From a business perspective, they are less likely to churn and more likely to refer friends, so we're hoping to trade off a lower revenue per user for a bigger and more engaged user base.	從商業的角度，他們是比較不會流失的客戶，比較有可能推薦朋友，所以，我們希望能把「每位使用者利潤」較低的使用者換成比較大、比較投入的使用者基礎。
Check and check.	打勾再打勾。
Now for that final question.	至於最後一個問題。
Would they keep coming back if they were no longer paid?	如果不再付錢給他們，他們會持續回來嗎？
Mathematics is so much more than just a subject you study at school.	數學絕對不只是你在學校學的一個科目。
It's a human endeavor.	它是人類的努力。
It's what helps us to understand the world around us.	它能協助我們了解我們周遭的世界。
And the more you know, the more you want to know.	你知道的越多，會想要知道更多。
So yes, we've triggered initial engagement with a financial reward.	所以，是的，我們用財務獎勵來觸發初始的投入。
But in the long run, the money won't matter anymore.	但從長期來說，錢就不再重要了。
Because in the long run, the wonder of mathematics will be the incentive and understanding it will be the reward.	因為，長期來說，獎勵，將會是見證數學的驚奇，報酬，則是讓你我真正了解它。
At some point in our lives, almost every one of us will have our heart broken.	幾乎每個人，在人生中的某個時點，都會遇到心碎的狀況。
My patient Kathy planned her wedding when she was in middle school.	我的病人凱西還在中學時就規劃了她的婚禮。
She would meet her future husband by age 27, get engaged a year later and get married a year after that.	她遇到未來老公的時間會是在二十七歲時，一年後他們會訂婚，再一年後結婚。
But when Kathy turned 27, she didn't find a husband.	但當凱西二十七歲時，她沒有找到老公。
She found a lump in her breast.	她找到的，是胸部的腫塊。
She went through many months of harsh chemotherapy and painful surgeries, and then just as she was ready to jump back into the dating world, she found a lump in her other breast and had to do it all over again.	她經歷了很多個月的辛苦化療，以及痛苦的手術，接著，就在她準備要跳回來約會的世界時，她在另一邊的胸部發現了腫塊，整個過程都得再重來一次。
Kathy recovered, though, and she was eager to resume her search for a husband as soon as her eyebrows grew back in.	不過，凱西恢復了，她很熱切地想繼續尋找她的老公，她打算等眉毛長回來就馬上行動。
When you're going on first dates in New York City, you need to be able to express a wide range of emotions.	當你在紐約市去赴第一次約會，你得要能夠表現出很多種情緒。
(Laughter) Soon afterwards, she met Rich and fell in love.	（笑聲）沒多久之後，她遇見了雷奇，陷入熱戀。
The relationship was everything she hoped it would be.	這段感情完全是她所希望的那樣子。
Six months later, after a lovely weekend in New England, Rich made reservations at their favorite romantic restaurant.	六個月之後，在新英格蘭度過了一個美好的週末之後，雷奇訂了他們最喜歡的浪漫餐廳。
Kathy knew he was going to propose, and she could barely contain her excitement.	凱西知道他要求婚了，她興奮難耐。
But Rich did not propose to Kathy that night.	但那晚，雷奇並沒有向凱西求婚。
He broke up with her.	他和她分手了。
As deeply as he cared for Kathy -- and he did -- he simply wasn't in love.	儘管他對凱西的關心很深 ──他真的關心過── 但他就是沒有愛上她。
Kathy was shattered.	凱西很震驚。
Her heart was truly broken, and she now faced yet another recovery.	她的心真的碎了，她現在又要面臨一次復原。
But five months after the breakup, Kathy still couldn't stop thinking about Rich.	但在分手後五個月，凱西仍然無法不去想雷奇。
Her heart was still very much broken.	她的心仍然支離破碎。
The question is: Why?	問題是：為什麼？
Why was this incredibly strong and determined woman unable to marshal the same emotional resources that got her through four years of cancer treatments?	為什麼這個極度堅強且堅定的女性，沒有辦法去整理這些和她四年癌症治療同樣的情緒來源？
Why do so many of us flounder when we're trying to recover from heartbreak?	為什麼有這麼多人試著從心碎中復原時，都那麼掙扎？
Why do the same coping mechanisms that get us through all kinds of life challenges fail us so miserably when our heart gets broken?	為什麼明明這些處理機制能幫我們走過各種人生中的困難，卻在我們的心碎時刻，完全派不上用場？
In over 20 years of private practice, I have seen people of every age and background face every manner of heartbreak, and what I've learned is this: when your heart is broken, the same instincts you ordinarily rely on will time and again lead you down the wrong path.	我私人執業的時間超過二十年，我見過各種年齡層、各種背景的人面臨各種心碎，而我所學到的是：當你的心碎了，你平常所仰賴的那些直覺會一而再，再而三地引導你走向錯誤的路。
You simply cannot trust what your mind is telling you.	你就是不能相信你的大腦告訴你的。
For example, we know from studies of heartbroken people that having a clear understanding of why the relationship ended is really important for our ability to move on.	比如，我們從關於心碎的人的研究得知，清楚了解為什麼感情關係會結束對於我們能否繼續走下去是很重要的。
Yet time and again, when we are offered a simple and honest explanation like the one Rich offered Kathy, we reject it.	但，一而再，再而三，我們得到的是一個簡單且誠實的解釋，就像雷奇給凱西的解釋，而我們不願接受。
Heartbreak creates such dramatic emotional pain, our mind tells us the cause must be equally dramatic.	心碎會造成非常戲劇性的痛苦，我們的大腦告訴我們，它的成因一定也是同等戲劇性的。
And that gut instinct is so powerful, it can make even the most reasonable and measured of us come up with mysteries and conspiracy theories where none exist.	那種直覺十分強大，甚至會讓最理性、最慎重的人，都會想出些根本不存在的謎團和陰謀論。
Kathy became convinced something must have happened during her romantic getaway with Rich that soured him on the relationship, and she became obsessed with figuring out what that was.	凱西深信，在她和雷奇浪漫之旅的過程中一定發生了什麼事，導致他對這段感情感到不快，而她變得執著在要想出原因是什麼。
And so she spent countless hours going through every minute of that weekend in her mind, searching her memory for clues that were not there.	於是，她花了無數小時，在腦中回想那個週末的每一分鐘，在記憶中尋找根本不存在的線索。
Kathy's mind tricked her into initiating this wild goose chase.	凱西的大腦騙了她，讓她開始了這場徒勞的追尋。
But what compelled her to commit to it for so many months?	但，是什麼強迫她投入這麼多個月的時間？
Heartbreak is far more insidious than we realize.	心碎比我們知道的還要更會在暗中滋生。
There is a reason we keep going down one rabbit hole after another, even when we know it's going to make us feel worse.	這就是我們會重蹈覆徹的原因，即使我們知道這麼做會讓我們感覺更糟糕。
Brain studies have shown that the withdrawal of romantic love activates the same mechanisms in our brain that get activated when addicts are withdrawing from substances like cocaine or opioids.	關於大腦的研究指出，脫離一段愛情會啟動的大腦機制，和成癮者要脫離古柯鹼或鴉片這類物質時是一樣的。
Kathy was going through withdrawal.	凱西在經歷的就是脫離。
And since she could not have the heroin of actually being with Rich, her unconscious mind chose the methadone of her memories with him.	她的海洛因就是和雷奇在一起，但她得不到，她無意識的大腦選擇用她和他的記憶當作止痛藥，
Her instincts told her she was trying to solve a mystery, but what she was actually doing was getting her fix.	她的直覺告訴她，她是在試著解一個謎團，但她真正在做的事，是給自己注射毒品。
This is what makes heartbreak so difficult to heal.	就是這樣，讓心碎很難治癒。
Addicts know they're addicted.	成癮者知道自己有癮。
They know when they're shooting up.	他們在注射毒品時是有自覺的。
But heartbroken people do not.	但心碎的人沒有。
But you do now.	但你現在知道了。
And if your heart is broken, you cannot ignore that.	如果你的心碎了，你不能忽略它。
You have to recognize that, as compelling as the urge is, with every trip down memory lane, every text you send, every second you spend stalking your ex on social media, you are just feeding your addiction, deepening your emotional pain and complicating your recovery.	儘管衝動很難抗拒，你仍必須了解，你每一次的回想，你發出的每一則訊息，你花在社交媒體上追蹤前任情人的每一秒鐘，你都只是在滿足你的癮，加深你情緒上的痛苦，讓你的復原變得更複雜。
Getting over heartbreak is not a journey.	度過心碎並不是一趟旅程。
It's a fight, and your reason is your strongest weapon.	它是場戰鬥，而你的理智是你最強的武器。
There is no breakup explanation that's going to feel satisfying.	沒有任何分手解釋會讓人感到滿意。
No rationale can take away the pain you feel.	沒有邏輯理由能帶走你所感受到的痛苦。
So don't search for one, don't wait for one, just accept the one you were offered or make up one yourself and then put the question to rest, because you need that closure to resist the addiction.	所以不用去找理由了，不要再等理由了，就接受你得到的理由吧，不然就自己編一個，然後就讓這個問題安息，因為你需要那個結束，來對抗你的癮。
And you need something else as well: you have to be willing to let go, to accept that it's over.	你還需要別的：你得要願意放手，接受感情已經結束。
Otherwise, your mind will feed on your hope and set you back.	不然，你的大腦會再給你希望，讓你無法前進。
Hope can be incredibly destructive when your heart is broken.	當你心碎時，希望是非常有毀滅性的。

Behavioral economists call this hyperbolic discounting.

行為經濟學家稱這個現象為「雙曲貼現」。

And Levitt goes as far as to say that all motivating power vanishes when rewards are handed out with a delay.

萊維特竟然還說，當獎賞的分發時間被延遲時，所有的驅動力量都會消失。

So, from a purely economic point of view: if we don't use immediate incentives, we are underinvesting in student outcomes.

所以，純粹從經濟的觀點來看：如果我們不使用立即的獎勵，我們對於學生成果的投資就是不足的。

I took heart from that, and came to see that as a society, we're actually quite used to financial incentives.

那增加了我的信心，我漸漸了解，我們這個社會其實很習慣財務的獎勵。

Whether it be by the government, by employers or at home.

不論是由政府提供、僱主提供，或家裡提供的獎勵。

For instance, many parents would pay their children an allowance or pocket money for doing chores in the house.

比如，許多父母會付錢給孩子，給他們零用錢或私房錢要他們做家事。

So it wasn't really all that controversial.

所以，這種做法並沒有那麼爭議。

As I thought about that, it started to answer that second question of how we were going to fund this.

當我想到這點時，它也開始解答了第二個問題，我們的資金從哪裡來。

Naturally, parents are the most invested in their children's education.

自然地，在孩子的教育中投資最多的人就是父母。

So, let's charge them a weekly subscription fee to use our program, but -- if the students complete their weekly maths goal, we'll refund the subscription amount directly into the child's bank account.

所以，咱們來向他們收取每週的訂購費，付費使用我們的程式，但是，如果學生完成了他們的每週數學目標，我們就把訂購費的金額直接退還到孩子的銀行帳戶中。

We chose three exercises completed over a one week period for a 10 dollar reward.

我們選了三項練習要在一週內完成，獎賞為 $10。

That way we're incentivizing effort rather than performance over a short enough period and with a substantial enough payout for the students to care.

這麼一來，我們在獎勵的就是努力而非表現，經過很短的時間就能得到獎勵，獎勵的金額也足夠讓學生在乎。

Now, I remember when I first told my wife about this new business model.

我記得我初次告訴我太太這個新的商業模型時的狀況。

If she had any doubt left that I've gone completely mad, that pretty much confirmed it for her.

如果她有一點點懷疑我完全瘋了，那幾乎讓她確認了。

She said to me, "Mo ...

她對我說：「小穆……

you realize that if everybody does their homework, which you want, you're not going to make any revenue, which you don't want.

你要知道，如果人人都如你所願好好地做他們的家庭作業，你就不會有任何利潤，這非你所願。

Great business model."

好棒的商業模型。」

(Laughter) I say it's more like an antibusiness model, it's free if you use it, but you pay if you don't.

（笑聲）我說，它比較像是個反商業模型，用它就是免費的，不用它就要付費。

Now, I knew from experience that not everybody in the country was going to jump on and do their maths homework every week.

根據經驗，我知道，不可能全國每個人都會因此動起來，並每週完成數學的家庭作業。

And if they did, sure we'd go bust pretty quickly, but hey, we would have solved the country's maths skills crisis.

若大家都做到，我們很快就會破產，但，嘿，我們就能解決這個國家的數學技能危機呢。

(Laughter) As a company, we've always run a double bottom line, looking to both make a return for investors as well as improve student outcomes.

（笑聲）我們開公司總是會有雙重底線，期望能為投資者取得收益，同時也要改善學生的結果。

We know that our path to long-term profitability is through improving student outcomes.

我們知道若想要有長期收益性，就要去改善學生的結果。

So our dual objectives should never be at odds.

所以，我們的雙重方針應該永遠不會不一致。

So we're always looking to make our product decisions around helping students reach their weekly maths goal, effectively ensuring that they get paid and not us.

所以，我們總是在注意，當要做產品決策時，要考量能協助學生達成他們的每週數學目標，有效地確保他們會賺到錢，而不是我們。

Now you must be wondering: How is this crazy business model going?

你們現在一定在納悶：這瘋狂的商業模型進展如何？

You'll be glad to know we're still in business.

你們會很高興知道，我們還在營運。

We've been testing this now for the last five months on just our personal home users in Australia before we think about rolling it out to schools.

過去五個月，我們一直在測試，對象只有我們在澳洲的居家個人使用者，之後才會考慮把它推展到學校。

And here are the early results.

這些是早期的結果。

The green represents students who are completing their weekly maths goal and the red those who aren't.

綠色代表的是完成每週數學目標的學生，紅色則是沒有完成。

You can see a lot more completing their homework than not.

你們能看到，完成的人比沒完成的人多很多。

In fact, as our user base has grown, we found the percentage to be pretty steady, at around 75 percent.

事實上，隨著我們的使用者基礎變大，我們發現，百分比相當穩定，大約在 75%。

So on average, we receive our weekly subscription fee once every four weeks, and the other three weeks, we're rewarding the students.

所以，平均來說，我們每四週會收到一次的每週訂購費，剩下的三週則是在獎勵學生。

Now of course we're leaving some money on the table here, but guess what?

當然，我們有把一些錢留在桌上，但，你們猜如何？

It turns out these students are 70 percent more engaged than students not on the reward program.

結果發現，這些學生比沒有參與獎勵方案的學生，投入程度還要高 70%。

Check.

打勾（確認）。

From a business perspective, they are less likely to churn and more likely to refer friends, so we're hoping to trade off a lower revenue per user for a bigger and more engaged user base.

從商業的角度，他們是比較不會流失的客戶，比較有可能推薦朋友，所以，我們希望能把「每位使用者利潤」較低的使用者換成比較大、比較投入的使用者基礎。

Check and check.

打勾再打勾。

Now for that final question.

至於最後一個問題。

Would they keep coming back if they were no longer paid?

如果不再付錢給他們，他們會持續回來嗎？

Mathematics is so much more than just a subject you study at school.

數學絕對不只是你在學校學的一個科目。

It's a human endeavor.

它是人類的努力。

It's what helps us to understand the world around us.

它能協助我們了解我們周遭的世界。

And the more you know, the more you want to know.

你知道的越多，會想要知道更多。

So yes, we've triggered initial engagement with a financial reward.

所以，是的，我們用財務獎勵來觸發初始的投入。

But in the long run, the money won't matter anymore.

但從長期來說，錢就不再重要了。

Because in the long run, the wonder of mathematics will be the incentive and understanding it will be the reward.

因為，長期來說，獎勵，將會是見證數學的驚奇，報酬，則是讓你我真正了解它。

At some point in our lives, almost every one of us will have our heart broken.

幾乎每個人，在人生中的某個時點，都會遇到心碎的狀況。

My patient Kathy planned her wedding when she was in middle school.

我的病人凱西還在中學時就規劃了她的婚禮。

She would meet her future husband by age 27, get engaged a year later and get married a year after that.

她遇到未來老公的時間會是在二十七歲時，一年後他們會訂婚，再一年後結婚。

But when Kathy turned 27, she didn't find a husband.

但當凱西二十七歲時，她沒有找到老公。

She found a lump in her breast.

她找到的，是胸部的腫塊。

She went through many months of harsh chemotherapy and painful surgeries, and then just as she was ready to jump back into the dating world, she found a lump in her other breast and had to do it all over again.

她經歷了很多個月的辛苦化療，以及痛苦的手術，接著，就在她準備要跳回來約會的世界時，她在另一邊的胸部發現了腫塊，整個過程都得再重來一次。

Kathy recovered, though, and she was eager to resume her search for a husband as soon as her eyebrows grew back in.

不過，凱西恢復了，她很熱切地想繼續尋找她的老公，她打算等眉毛長回來就馬上行動。

When you're going on first dates in New York City, you need to be able to express a wide range of emotions.

當你在紐約市去赴第一次約會，你得要能夠表現出很多種情緒。

(Laughter) Soon afterwards, she met Rich and fell in love.

（笑聲）沒多久之後，她遇見了雷奇，陷入熱戀。

The relationship was everything she hoped it would be.

這段感情完全是她所希望的那樣子。

Six months later, after a lovely weekend in New England, Rich made reservations at their favorite romantic restaurant.

六個月之後，在新英格蘭度過了一個美好的週末之後，雷奇訂了他們最喜歡的浪漫餐廳。

Kathy knew he was going to propose, and she could barely contain her excitement.

凱西知道他要求婚了，她興奮難耐。

But Rich did not propose to Kathy that night.

但那晚，雷奇並沒有向凱西求婚。

He broke up with her.

他和她分手了。

As deeply as he cared for Kathy -- and he did -- he simply wasn't in love.

儘管他對凱西的關心很深 ──他真的關心過── 但他就是沒有愛上她。

Kathy was shattered.

凱西很震驚。

Her heart was truly broken, and she now faced yet another recovery.

她的心真的碎了，她現在又要面臨一次復原。

But five months after the breakup, Kathy still couldn't stop thinking about Rich.

但在分手後五個月，凱西仍然無法不去想雷奇。

Her heart was still very much broken.

她的心仍然支離破碎。

The question is: Why?

問題是：為什麼？

Why was this incredibly strong and determined woman unable to marshal the same emotional resources that got her through four years of cancer treatments?

為什麼這個極度堅強且堅定的女性，沒有辦法去整理這些和她四年癌症治療同樣的情緒來源？

Why do so many of us flounder when we're trying to recover from heartbreak?

為什麼有這麼多人試著從心碎中復原時，都那麼掙扎？

Why do the same coping mechanisms that get us through all kinds of life challenges fail us so miserably when our heart gets broken?

為什麼明明這些處理機制能幫我們走過各種人生中的困難，卻在我們的心碎時刻，完全派不上用場？

In over 20 years of private practice, I have seen people of every age and background face every manner of heartbreak, and what I've learned is this: when your heart is broken, the same instincts you ordinarily rely on will time and again lead you down the wrong path.

我私人執業的時間超過二十年，我見過各種年齡層、各種背景的人面臨各種心碎，而我所學到的是：當你的心碎了，你平常所仰賴的那些直覺會一而再，再而三地引導你走向錯誤的路。

You simply cannot trust what your mind is telling you.

你就是不能相信你的大腦告訴你的。

For example, we know from studies of heartbroken people that having a clear understanding of why the relationship ended is really important for our ability to move on.

比如，我們從關於心碎的人的研究得知，清楚了解為什麼感情關係會結束對於我們能否繼續走下去是很重要的。

Yet time and again, when we are offered a simple and honest explanation like the one Rich offered Kathy, we reject it.

但，一而再，再而三，我們得到的是一個簡單且誠實的解釋，就像雷奇給凱西的解釋，而我們不願接受。

Heartbreak creates such dramatic emotional pain, our mind tells us the cause must be equally dramatic.

心碎會造成非常戲劇性的痛苦，我們的大腦告訴我們，它的成因一定也是同等戲劇性的。

And that gut instinct is so powerful, it can make even the most reasonable and measured of us come up with mysteries and conspiracy theories where none exist.

那種直覺十分強大，甚至會讓最理性、最慎重的人，都會想出些根本不存在的謎團和陰謀論。

Kathy became convinced something must have happened during her romantic getaway with Rich that soured him on the relationship, and she became obsessed with figuring out what that was.

凱西深信，在她和雷奇浪漫之旅的過程中一定發生了什麼事，導致他對這段感情感到不快，而她變得執著在要想出原因是什麼。

And so she spent countless hours going through every minute of that weekend in her mind, searching her memory for clues that were not there.

於是，她花了無數小時，在腦中回想那個週末的每一分鐘，在記憶中尋找根本不存在的線索。

Kathy's mind tricked her into initiating this wild goose chase.

凱西的大腦騙了她，讓她開始了這場徒勞的追尋。

But what compelled her to commit to it for so many months?

但，是什麼強迫她投入這麼多個月的時間？

Heartbreak is far more insidious than we realize.

心碎比我們知道的還要更會在暗中滋生。

There is a reason we keep going down one rabbit hole after another, even when we know it's going to make us feel worse.

這就是我們會重蹈覆徹的原因，即使我們知道這麼做會讓我們感覺更糟糕。

Brain studies have shown that the withdrawal of romantic love activates the same mechanisms in our brain that get activated when addicts are withdrawing from substances like cocaine or opioids.

關於大腦的研究指出，脫離一段愛情會啟動的大腦機制，和成癮者要脫離古柯鹼或鴉片這類物質時是一樣的。

Kathy was going through withdrawal.

凱西在經歷的就是脫離。

And since she could not have the heroin of actually being with Rich, her unconscious mind chose the methadone of her memories with him.

她的海洛因就是和雷奇在一起，但她得不到，她無意識的大腦選擇用她和他的記憶當作止痛藥，

Her instincts told her she was trying to solve a mystery, but what she was actually doing was getting her fix.

她的直覺告訴她，她是在試著解一個謎團，但她真正在做的事，是給自己注射毒品。

This is what makes heartbreak so difficult to heal.

就是這樣，讓心碎很難治癒。

Addicts know they're addicted.

成癮者知道自己有癮。

They know when they're shooting up.

他們在注射毒品時是有自覺的。

But heartbroken people do not.

但心碎的人沒有。

But you do now.

但你現在知道了。

And if your heart is broken, you cannot ignore that.

如果你的心碎了，你不能忽略它。

You have to recognize that, as compelling as the urge is, with every trip down memory lane, every text you send, every second you spend stalking your ex on social media, you are just feeding your addiction, deepening your emotional pain and complicating your recovery.

儘管衝動很難抗拒，你仍必須了解，你每一次的回想，你發出的每一則訊息，你花在社交媒體上追蹤前任情人的每一秒鐘，你都只是在滿足你的癮，加深你情緒上的痛苦，讓你的復原變得更複雜。

Getting over heartbreak is not a journey.

度過心碎並不是一趟旅程。

It's a fight, and your reason is your strongest weapon.

它是場戰鬥，而你的理智是你最強的武器。

There is no breakup explanation that's going to feel satisfying.

沒有任何分手解釋會讓人感到滿意。

No rationale can take away the pain you feel.

沒有邏輯理由能帶走你所感受到的痛苦。

So don't search for one, don't wait for one, just accept the one you were offered or make up one yourself and then put the question to rest, because you need that closure to resist the addiction.

所以不用去找理由了，不要再等理由了，就接受你得到的理由吧，不然就自己編一個，然後就讓這個問題安息，因為你需要那個結束，來對抗你的癮。

And you need something else as well: you have to be willing to let go, to accept that it's over.

你還需要別的：你得要願意放手，接受感情已經結束。

Otherwise, your mind will feed on your hope and set you back.

不然，你的大腦會再給你希望，讓你無法前進。

Hope can be incredibly destructive when your heart is broken.

當你心碎時，希望是非常有毀滅性的。